Fat Men Who Breath Heavily

Pollution from average fat mans house.

Reports fresh the EPA show that a new source of pollution has been recently been identified.

According to the report, fat men who breath heavily contribute much more carbon dioxide then the average human being.

"Winter is the worst time of the year for fat men to be breathing heavily. Without the leaves on the trees to convert that carbon dioxide into oxygen, certain sections of the north pole are become supersaturated with the pollutant."

Meteorologists across the country are forecasting temperatures in the north pole to spike into the upper 90s next week as the carbon dioxide concentration produces major greenhouse effects.

The FDA unveiled it's plan to regulate this new source of pollution by retrofitting the mouth and nostrils with carbon dioxide filters for fat men who breath heavily.

"We feel this is a good alternative then our original idea. Taxing fat men who breath heavily would likely garner much money at all as most spend all of their cash on Cheetos and the like."

Satire Sanity News Corp. 2012