Monday, October 22, 2012

President Obama: No Nuclear Talks With Iran

Today, the President declared that he did not wish to talk about anything "nuclear" with the leader of Iran.

After the last attempt to talk about nuclear related events, President Obama was exasperated after what can only be described as a mind-warping presentation from Ahmadinejad himself. You can check out our coverage of the presentation here.

"Ahmadinejad is a nice guy, alright. But every time we get together and play golf, all he does is talk about his nuclear program and his attempt to create viable nuclear kitchen appliances. Enough is enough, we can play golf next Sunday, Ahmadinejad, but no nuclear talk, at all."

President Ahmadinejad reportedly was very hurt by Obama's comment and was seen writing an apology with tears streaked all over his handwriting. 

"If I had known Ahmadinejad was going to act this way, I would have been a little less abrasive with my approach. Ahmadinejad, if you're watching, if it pleases you, we could talk about destroying Israel instead?"

Ahmadinejad responded in an email several seconds later.

"That would be awesome! You really know how to comfort a friend. We can talk about my new nuclear blender on a future date.

Best Friends Forever,

Your Favorite Dictator, Ahmadinejad

P.S. My new blender is really awesome! It makes your snacks glow in the dark so you don't have to turn on the light to eat!"

--

In other news, a mysterious form of energy, who insisted his name was Nuclear, was unsure why Obama would have to clarify that he, Nuclear, was not talking to Iran.

"Maybe I misunderstood the headlines, but I am sure it was referring to me!"

Satire Sanity News Corp 2012.

No comments:

Post a Comment